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PART 1 - NORTHERN VIETNAM
HANOI
DAY 1
Leaving Linda in Bali, where she returned to Australia, 2 hours later I was sat on a Vietjet flight to Hanoi, with legroom for the average sized SE Asian too! Five hours later and at 10 pm I arrived at Hanoi. Not chaotic at all at the airport, which I had been forewarned about, but perhaps by the time of the late arrival, the taxi wannabes were back home. My man was waiting there, and there followed a good 30 min drive into Hanoi.
Anyway, looking forward to a restful night, as I switched the bedside light off, a friggin great cockroach jumped up....the only one I saw in the room during my stay, thank goodness. Although I jumped out of bed and retrieved the travel sleeping sleeve that Lin had made for the kids for their travelling, which I thought I'd never use!
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After breakfast (varied choice with nice fruits, but noodles for breakie!), I followed ChatGPT advice to have a soft start, and caught a GRAB taxi to Lake Hoan Kiem. Very nice, I had a potter around and a coffee. Many families were out in their best traditional garbs having photos across the lake. At the top of the Lake I wandered into the notoriously frantic Old Quarter, and at this fairly early time it looked quite civilised....almost immediately I went into a shop and bought a (probably not) North Face fleece jacket (I'd stupidly left my decent hiking jacket in Australia)...think it cost me about £16, and I didn't even barter...not sure why not?
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Next on my "hit Hanoi in one day to get out list" was the war museum about 20km out of the centre...so I got a Grab, only to find out it was closed, yes, for Tet for the whole week....eventually getting a taxi, I went back to the Old Quarter to collect my jacket....and what a change!
It was like someone had opened the floodgates. It was steaming with people mainly Vietnamese, classic road scenes with 1000s of scooters and motorbikes and no rules, plus cars of course....I made a mad decision (in retrospect to walk back to my hotel, some 40 mins) I thought it may be interesting, but fucking hell....I really took my life in my hands...traffic was mental, motorbikes ignore one way streets, and pavements are nearly all blocked with parked bikes, cars or even tables...you have to walk in the gutter often....by the time I got to my hotel my energy levels and enthusiasm had plummeted from an 8 to a 3....and it was to worsen.
I planned to go to Nimh Binh the next day, so set about booking a shared taxi....but I couldn't get one, I must have spent 2 hours....all taken because of Tet...the Vietnamese were heading there too (I later learnt). However, I was rescued by the wonderful receptionist (Tina) who must herself had spent an hour searching, so transit sorted. Now I needed to eat...many places were shut (Tet) or rammed, and I wanted to stay local....eventually a woman was street cooking with a few empty tables, they threw a menu at me and I just selected a picture! Noodles soup with spongy tasteless chunks, I Google photo translated, and it was snail soup! At least I felt invigorated with some fuelling! And the fireworks were plentiful again, right outside my window after midnight. Tet!
DAY 3 Nimh Bimh
My "taxi" arrived. I don't think it was a taxi...as also with me were 3 Vietnamese sat in the back and the driver...I got the impression it was friends of the receptionist who squeezed me in for about £10, for over a 2 hour journey...no conversation of course, no music, and nothing to write home about from the views...the urban sprawl went on for most of the journey, with nothing rural to really see....
The first hotel I booked cancelled, but fortunately I got another, only to arrive and it was locked up and closed (for fvckin Tet) but bookings were still active. I went to a pizza/ pasta place next door (a rare opportunity away from rice and noodles) and had some carbonara and at the same time, the lady was attempting to chase the owner. First BS was they would be back at 2pm, then later cos at a Tet party...so I went for a walk...returned to meet the owner...all Google translate that was doing my head in, her telling me I had not booked, when I had it in black and white, and showed her the still active booking. Anyway, after the whole afternoon I fortunately got another place, again in Nimh Bimh centre, which was really not the correct location, although it had a silver lining.
In the evening I walked again to the old town with the lake and two impressive pagodas, and surrounded by lots of lanterned rowing boats...all lit up...quite a sight. But it was rammed mainly with Vietnamese. It really was a gorgeous and quintessential Vietnamese sight.
Getting back to my hotel at 10pm, I started mentally struggling on how I was to see things of interest, and what and where were they...another consequence of Tet was a lot of tours had been cancelled, even last minute I later learnt....anyway I found one for first thing the following morning..
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DAY 4 Day Tour Tam Coc
The real traveller / backpacker area is Tam Coc, some 20 mins drive from where I was staying, where all the hostels, bars and eateries were based....and the tourist locations. Great to finally meet others, and we all got on well...visiting Bai Dinh Pagoda, the Ancient Capital, and Trang An (the Karst landscape with the boats and river). But it was absolutely rammed beyond imagination...mainly Vietnamese...these religious places are their pilgrimage during Tet, so why I came here this week...seriously it was mental...one of the guys walked off....it really took the edge off it....and by the 3rd location (the boats, 2 hours in boat, too long....queuing to get through caves etc crazy). Everyone was exhausted by the end and we still had one place left, Mua Cave and Viewpoint, which was the one thing I wanted to see....suffice to say they cancelled it...only 4 out of about 25 wanted to go, we were over 2 hours behind schedule and it was getting dark!
BTW the religious artefacts were astounding, see photos, but after a short time I'd seen enough not 2 friggin hours of it!.
Also difficult to point a finger, but why did the receptionist at Hanoi advise me to delay going to Nimh Binh....my next location was tourist only, I should have swapped them around....
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DAY 5 - Van Long Nature Reserve
Brooke, a lovely "Events Organiser" 🙄 I met the day before, suggested a day out with a friend she had met. She set up a WhatsApp group, suggested locations, start time everything...sounds great! All finalised at 1120pm...She wanted an early start, so I was in the center by 8am looking for non noodles (got bananas)....suddenly she sent a message, saying she wanted to do something else and that was that....kin L, suffice to say I left her a very assertive voice note...fuckin Events Organiser....😅
Anyhow although annoyed for a short time, I had to reassess...and quickly decided to pick up a motorbike....and off I went to the World Heritage site of Van Long about 20km away. It was great being on the bike, I felt free and in control for the first time (except the busy Hanoi road where I had to do a left turn across the insane unruly traffic 😳).....anyway what a contrast to Trang An....same extension of the Karst scenery and flooded valley, but so blissful, comparatively so much quieter but definitely more nature based almost spiritual. It was midday and warm so the bird life was very quiet, although we saw a stunning kingfisher...but the main attraction the Delacour Langur monkeys were all asleep, according to my rather aged rower!
Before the boat, there were tiny lanes adjacent to the waters, in the distance was an impressive white cathedral....not my bag, but I had to check it out....this was in English, Langholm Van Church....rather an understatement.calling it a church. I took the tourist photos and then about 15 young lads on motorbikes arrived and waved at me (common where very few westerners), then wanted a photo....have a look....as my son mentioned the height difference, and it looked like I was a touring pop star!!
Disaster! After the boat I returned to the motorbike, and saw stupidly I'd left the keys in the ignition (2 hours on the boat) and learnt...I'd flattened the friggin battery....what a fvcking stupid owd git...just not me....the lady (another one bailing me out) called the hire peeps and an hour later brought a replacement, of course I pleaded innocence.
So I just then followed my nose along the waters and villages and came to a cafe constructed over paddy fields....with the karst structures in the background. Different for a cafe stop!
I Google mapped the journey back, and it was saying an hour, so I'd ridden away from Nimh Binh....I got back OK but had to keep stopping to check the map, you really need a bracket and USB for a phone, which apparently you can get....it did sap my energy levels, but soon got to the edge of Nimh Binh....
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It was an hour or so off sunset, and the sun looked magnificent, so I detoured to Mua Viewpoint. Within kilometres of reaching the start point, the writing was on the wall....the roads super narrowed and clogged with cars, buses, motorbikes and cycles all heading the same way....but not Vietnamese....these were throngs of western travellers,....eventually the 500 step route to the view came in sight, and there was a queue....so, I thought fuck that....the beautiful sunset had brought everyone out....and turned back.
This was becoming a pattern....the throngs of western travellers, and specific tourist "must gotos " - I like the geography etc but not the circus, which is what they are. Thinking, if my equivalent Vietnamese living locally that was into scenery etc, they would know where to go with probably better scenery in isolation....like I can do back home, but here I have no knowledge, NO CONTROL....
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I whizzed back, deciding to revisit that pizza place, stopping again to check Google Maps....the lady greeted me like a lost friend....I ate an interesting creamy chicken pizza and returned my scooter nearby.
This was some 4km from my digs, and I couldn't get a taxi (Tet) the center again was rammed....and I walked home, my energy levels were back down again...and I still had to finalise my move away....
Our "Events Organiser" 😅 gave me an agents WhatsApp, and I decided to book a cruise at Sa Long Bay....2 nights 3 days (mistake!).
DAY 6 and 7 Sa Long Bay
Collected at 7.30am - again a nice group, although all got dropped off at different places....arrived at Sa Long, and met about 12 others boarding...although I was the only one doing 2 nights. In retrospect 1 night would have been better but I wanted to push back another further day because I was planning a trekking tour later the following week....unfortunately very misty, but did kind of clear but it was never sunny. Again classic Karst limestone scenery: cliffs, monoliths etc with a the sea below - classic Vietnamese scenes that you see on TV! All kind of tourist activity based: kayaking through a cave, feeding the monkeys (one mother got very irate and at one point thought was going to attack); swimming (not me); Tiptop Island with a few hundred steps to a great summit view, but had to queue to get up and down. The sea at night was full of cruise boats of all standards, ours near the bottom! Good social onboard later with 2 Greek guys, 2 French girls and an Indonesian guy...the food was well, very Vietnamese....included also Oysters and Prawns....but far too much offered.
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DAY 7 - 2nd Night - Ha Long Bay
Unfortunately I was leaving the gang on the boat, and being transferred to another boat for my second day....but I started to get suspicious that my itinerary was not going to be adhered to...with event repeats. Cut a long story, the fvcker agent had sent me an itinerary that was for a different company and their itinerary....and 4* to the one he put me on....so no cycling and no National Park visit....but 3 lots of kayaking and repeat caves.....again annoying, but nothing I could do....the guides tried to help, but the boat had already disappeared that perhaps I should've been on....
Returning to my original boat, the new guests were 8 Vietnamese and one Pole (who had very limited English, and with my energy levels again low down I found the poor lad too much hard work! ). On a rare occasion I didn't feel very sociable, not that I could anyway and retired to my room.
Again, no plan.....I am usually good at planning even spontaneously but struggled in this first week (although Tet has not helped, hopefully it will now be easier)....and as mentioned above I have little personal control or understanding on how best to do things....I have multiple ideas....and then my brain gets overwhelmed. A good example, I thought of doing the Da Giang loop....classic north mountain motorbike trip....minimum 3 days, hostel based....I hesitate on hostels (at my age) and also that road I have been informed is rammed with motorcycles and queues at viewpoints.....one head says just do it irrespective and then the other side pushes back....
Not being in a hostel is a definite disadvantage.....you meet people, they pass on tips and contacts and the hostels themselves make a living out of organising every tour under the sun! There are apps like Klook that offer all sorts too....My pal, back in the day hired a driver to do day trips, again to occasionally use would be good....very much like we did in Bali.
I just need to get my head around the best process or combo of procrsses for me, it will come! Too much overthinking, which is exactly what I tell my kids not to do!
DAY 8 Sa Long Bay return to Hanoi
Last morning on the boat, felt better this morning, and especially booking the Pu Luong trip on Wednesday.....stayed on the boat for their final "event" as it was revisiting one of the caves / beach I'd already been to....but used time well, writing all this!
Finally at the harbour (HOORAY!) with even yet another meal while hovering just offshore!
Awaiting the bus, got chatting to an Aussie, who was from Brisbane and a helicopter rescue guy....telling me about how frequent rescues are from Mt Barney ! Also snake chat, says most rescues are non snake bites but perhaps a scratch from, something esp campers going out for a piss at night! And that adult snakes can bite to warn but not release the venom, whereas young ones empty their poison, cause not yet trained! Anyhow that was Australia....onto Hanoi...
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Back to where I started at the Babylon Grand, and Tina had booked me a nicer room with a bath....felt good to be back after that intensive week....I had a soak (after washing some clothes, and hanging up on the aircon on heat mode!)...then went for a local wander.
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DAY 9 HANOI - my "free day"
West Lake, which was always an accommodation district option pre visit, was actually just 3 mins away...unfortunately a murky morning, I wandered around the lower part of the lake, again it was so good that everything was now open and active...I went via the Tran Quoc pagoda (another one 🙄)....and eventually popped into a Vietnamese cafe (no cappuccino!). I was unsure what to order, so just went along with something the waiter said to me, which was just a thick black coffee, with water and a cup of green tea...I hardly touched the coffee, and replaced it with a pineapple smoothie.
I ordered a Grab motorbike (I had to experience one just once, and being on a motorbike on the insane Hanoi roads) I survived! The target were some murals at Phung Hung, before checking them out I passed a croissant bakery, and consumed the most wonderful savoury and sweet croissants - really exquisite! I used Google translate to tell the young woman how good they were, I think I made her day!
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As were the murals, they were really interesting, love street art! Now I was in the more real (non touristy) part of Hanoi, with hardly any western faces..the next target was the Long Bien Bridge - rail bridge with motorbike lanes either side, in order to view the huge Red River....the route to get there was down a series of small back lanes with back to back market type stores all selling more or less the same domestic and hardware stuff, I bought a pair of scissors! The bridge walk was kind of interesting, but I wouldn't repeat...it went above very poor looking dwellings, a combo of scrubland and a creek that was absolutely loaded with garbage of all sorts....sanitation is apparently a major issue...in fact I'd observed lots of rubbish in many places....and a dwelling right in the middle of what looked like an overflow stenchy stretch of water....it was still quite grim, and the eventual vista of the river was nothing special.
Walking back my energy levels were dropping....the intensity especially the traffic really is a drain....I had to cross a major road at one point, and waited ages for a green man...but locals just slowly wander across, and the traffic weaves around them....eventually back to the hotel for a reset...Hanoi does challenge those energy levels.
Early ish night, ready for another exit from Hanoi!
DAY 10 - Mai Chau Valley
My 7am taxi, was typically late, to take me to the bus station to catch the minibus on my 2 day tour...but once arrived it took nearly an hour to cover just 10km...insane traffic.
Eventually set off, with me the only apparent tourist, was a bus service too. Unfortunately very misty on the 3 hours (150km SW) drive over a pass and through mountains, saw not a lot! Arrived in Mai Chau Valley at an eco resort / homestay- very nice. Lunch immediately, and joined the only other resident a French guy from Cannes.
Soon, I was met by my young lady cycle guide, on a very basic small boneshaker....took me all around the valley, through the paddy fields...all rice for local consumption with families owning and working several "squares "....lovely setting surrounded on all sides by forested mountains....went through a few villages, including her own...but also included tourist guff...not just markets, but weaving (do you want to try, no the fvck I don't), some women suddenly started traditional dancing encouraging me to join in, and a nose in someone's house! Hitting the main street, the markets there were quite interesting, with live so many things....hens, eels, fish, lots of maggot / weevil larvae creatures that my guide bought a bagful for her evening meal! The guide was lovely but she found it difficult to understand me, if I asked questions!
After dropping me off, I continued riding for another hour or so, much nicer tbh. With a beer at the end on a stilt cafe out on the paddy fields.
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I did reflect on the contradiction between eco tourism, and the relative wealth of the visitors and the poverty of the locals. Apparently they earn just enough each month just to survive...about 3 - 4M dong (£90 to £120).
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Collected by "Tom" on a motorbike at 0830, which I did not expect, but it was great! Very rainy at start...but eased as we climbed up and up away from the valley into the mountains...rain and cloud forest, but with some clarity and much atmosphere. We eventually reached a village high up above another valley, with views of the terraced paddy fields...and that is where we walked, only about 3km but was nice and interesting and free from anyone else! One guy was using some machinery, which has been introduced very recently....Tom also explained that Vietnam has over 50 ethnic races each with their own language, but all also communicate using Vietnamese...the Mai Chau Valley are White Thais but not as in Thailand....
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We descended, and hit some heavy rain but survived, fortunately I had my Old Quarter North Face fleece and brought my cycling rain jacket! Irrespective one of my best days...it's that freedom and space! (And mountain vistas).
More food on return, my birthday meal! With my French pal, then 2 beers at the stilt cafe...bus back at 3pm.
Now it was blue sky, and we stopped at a valley view point, which really showed the splendour of the region...Great views!
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And unlike the journey from Hanoi, it was clear all the way back, revealing some cracking mountain structures....again, if you were local, these are the places you could explore away from the tourist honeypots.
Comfort break on way back, could not resist a sweetcorn ice lolly, it was rather nice!
Dropped off in the mayhem of Hanoi with an 8 min walk to the hotel, had a very close call crossing a road, but survived. Decided to chill and stay in and eat the room pot noodles, then I got a knock on the door!
A birthday cake, how lovely, how sweet....that Tina!!
After breakie caught a GRAB bike to the Old Quarter and very soon found an outdoor shop! New "North Face" rucksack, not sure how long it will last! But they sold really good looking goretex jackets of all description, they looked good not sure how good they would be when tested.
Bought a milky coffee (Bac Xiu) and sat by the lake Hoan Kiem, a piece of tranquility on the edge of the Old Quarter!
Back to the gaff on another grab bike and farewells until the next time, and off to the airport.
But where to ? 😅
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